By Alice Vo Edwards
I am Hapa.
From the Hawaiian, meaning “half”
I am one of many
Who are half Asian, half “other”
Am I the only lonely Hapa, I wonder?
Part displaced Asian, part white mutt
Wholey longing for connection
To some deeper meaning
Some family tribe?
As an immigrant
Who couldn’t speak English well
My mother decided being Asian
Was not a blessing
And did her best to Americanize me
But she couldn’t take away
The color of my skin
The slant of my eyes
That make Chinese airline attendants
Try to speak to me in Chinese
And Vietnamese nail salon workers
Try to speak to me in Vietnamese
With American arrogance
(Is this what it means to be
A White supremacist?)
My father taught me nothing
About our family history.
Was there nothing to be proud of?
Or did he simply think
Being American was enough?
I am Hapa
I am a partially-filled void
Feeling ever “half”
Ever searching to find meaning
Struggling for completion
Still looking for my tribe.
Contact Info:
Alice Vo Edwards
Graduate Student at Walden University
Industrial / Organizational Psychology
alice.edwards@waldenu.edu
Published in the APA Div 35 Section 5 (The Asian Pacific Women’s Connection (Section V))
Summer 2018 newsletter
https://www.apadivisions.org/division-35/publications/newsletters/asian-pacific/index
